M&R; An Old Chestnut

Roxanne fidgeted before her best friend. She’d sat down with a plop on the couch and slapped widespread fingers on her thighs. She started to speak, then drew breathe, smiled weakly at the woman to whom she told everything and began to speak.

“You know Maeve; I just love your husband to death. He introduced me to my husband and eventually you. He’s responsible for all the happiness in my life. I’ll never have a bad word to say about him. Now, we aren’t the kind of people who cares what everyone else thinks…“

“Actually, I think it’s me who doesn’t care. “ Maeve whispered back softly. “I remember once a party we hosted. One of the guests commented to me within hearing of your husband, that all the guests seemed to be your friends and hardly any of them were mine. Your husband responded for me. Moved in close and stood over the person who was sitting on the couch next to me. “Yeah, my wife knows everyone and loves everyone. My sister-in-law and I only love a few people and spit on everyone else.””

Roxanne blushed with surprised embarrassment, holding her manicured right hand over her mouth. Maeve started snickering at the thought of the spittle flying in the direction of the offensive guest as Stan said the word “spit”. Maeve finally admitted why she giggled. Roxanne roared again! Roxanne laughed so hard she bent in half and the blush ran all the way down her chest. She laughed so hard she couldn‘t breath. The effort to restrain herself forced tears into to Maeve ever-somber dark eyes and made her bosom heave with hiccup-like breathes.

When they recovered, Roxanne let out a lyrical sigh, saying, “Well, gossip is that your husband flirts with every woman he meets.”

Maeve smiles a sly smile, one corner of her mouth rising higher than the other. “He just tells them the truth. He just tells them they are good, beautiful, smart and a gift from God.”

“But, dearie; not all women are good and beautiful.”

That cocky smile again; “But, Roxanne he never talks to the evil, ugly one.”

Roxanne’s jaw drops. Her eyes, red with recent laughter grow wide. Her tear-stained checks begin to crack into her ever-ready smile. She roars again. Maeve is clearly enjoying the moment. An outside observer might have noted she was bidding her time. Roxanne regains her composure for a second time. Maeve licks her lower blood red lip with the tip of her little pink tongue and then asks. “You didn’t hear this from some green-eyed, horse-faced, flat-chested munchkin we both know, did you?”

This time Maeve actually was concerned about her sister’s well-being, that she laughed so without self-restraint. She thought about telling Roxanne so, but thought better of it.
“We’re awful!” Roxanne gasped. “You know everything!”

“No!” Maeve insisted with a wave of her hand. “You and my husband know everyone, hear everything and share with me. I see a few things and just put two and two together.” She glanced Heavenward, rolling her eyes that way as though giving all the glory to God. Then a thought visibly struck her and her black eyes veered away from her best friend. “You know the one thing I can’t see?”

Roxanne looked Maeve’s way hopefully.

“I can’t see either of our husbands ever cheating on us. Particularly yours.” Maeve stated firmly and quietly.

Roxanne took a deep breathe and for the first time today, rather than laugh, she blushed with pride.